Hello! So I thought I’d dust off the old laptop and write a few things down.
Things have got a bit less crazy and I feel like I have a bit more time to write. I love writing my blog – regardless if people read it or not. It’s very cathartic and I love that I have a space somewhere where I’ve jotted thoughts and memories down. I mean, obviously a lot of it’s about running but I want to share some aspects of motherhood and life lately too. Significant stuff basically.
Isaac is now almost 7 months old. Like a broken record I’m going to say how incredible it seems that he’s that old, and yet it also feels a lifetime ago that he was born. So much has happened, so much has changed – with him, with us, with life in general. Of course it would… but yeah it’s just a bit mental.
I won’t lie though. It has been incredibly hard. I’ve struggled a lot with being a mum. So much anxiety, so much second guessing and wondering if I’m doing a good enough job. Constantly wondering if Isaac loves me and is happy I’m his mum. Hoping every day I’m doing a good job and doing the best for him. I know I’m not alone in these feelings and it’s kind of par for the course, but god it’s a lot. Throw in lack of sleep and it’s quite overwhelming at times.
Crucially I’ve learnt that it’s important to not compare yourself or your child to anyone else. I mean, I knew this before about running, but applying it to being a mum and seeing other babies and how they’re doing and what they’re doing, it’s another level. Everyone wants to do the best for their child and I’m sure everyone is doing the best in whatever shape that takes, and every child is different so comparisons are really pointless.
But anyway, Isaac is doing marvellously. His personality is coming alive. He’s more aware of the world and just wants to be fully involved at all times. It’s lovely and exhausting! I just love that we can play a bit more – rather than just dangle things in front of him.
I’m also thoroughly enjoying weaning him. He’s still being breastfed so coupling that with “real” food now is another fun challenge but I love seeing his reactions to different foods and seeing what he likes and what he doesn’t. Obviously it all changes and things he hates one day he adores the next so that’s a fun puzzle to play each day!
Running is going really well. I can’t believe how my fitness has improved. I’m running around 30 miles a week currently, four times. Usually a 6 miler, a 7 miler then 3 miles (possibly parkrun) and then a longer run. I’m currently training for the Goodwood Marathon on 13th February so that’s been taking my focus.
What’s hugely helped has been running with Isaac in the running buggy. We use the Out N About Nipper Sport running buggy and it’s brilliant. Super light, lots of suspension (great getting up curbs). But the only thing is the fixed wheel at the front is tough when you’re turning corners but you just get used to it.
It’s hard though. It’s a lot more effort, obviously, than just running on your own. But I think this has helped my fitness. I run slower with the bugger, of course, but the effort level is a lot harder and it’s almost like strength training. So doing that for my 6 and 7 milers each week has ramped my strength and endurance up nicely. Long time readers and anyone who knows me knows I hate and rarely do speed training!
I also do two strength sessions a week as well. One is just a home workout I do with lighter weights for about 30-45mins. And the other sessions is with my personal trainer at the gym. We focus on lifting quite heavy weights rather than volume. I’m really proud that my squats have worked up to 8 reps of 82.5kg! This is more than I was lifting before I was pregnant (just!). So my legs feel nice and strong. It definitely helps keep injuries away.
So that’s a little update from me. I hope to get more into the swing of things again with blogging. Fingers crossed 🙂