So Kyle and I are going on holiday tomorrow to Orlando... without Isaac. And yes I do feel like the worst mother typing that out. Now I know I don’t need to justify the decisions we make and realistically this isn’t the worst thing a parent has done ever, however the mum guilt I feel is intense.
Originally when we were initially planning this holiday, we were going to go as a big family holiday with Isaac, my parents and Kyle’s mum. But as the months ticked on last year and with the cost of living going up, the parents decided it was just too expensive for them. Considering they wouldn’t be going for the theme parks like Kyle and I were, it was an expensive family holiday for them.
I totally understood and that was absolutely fine, of course. So Kyle and I continued to plan to go just the three of us. But when we were planning and researching and seeing Isaac himself change and grow we realised that the holiday would be, well, stressful.
Maybe when Isaac was 6 months would be OK as he would be fine with being in the pram a lot and would nap on the go, but at 18 months old it would be unfair. He wants to be up and about exploring. But currently he just loves exploring fields, forests and pavements. He has no idea what Disney even is yet!
So we decided not to take him.
The levels of mum guilt are insane though. I’m a bag full of emotions right now. I’m going to miss him so much and worry about him constantly (even though he’ll be with his Nanas and will be absolutely fine), and I feel like the worst mother in the world.
Kyle says he doesn’t feel guilty at all. We deserve the break (18 months of rubbish sleep!). It’s not that he’s not going to miss him or doesn’t care as much as I do, he just has a different perspective. I admire him for that. A good number of nights I’ve spent awake considering our decision.
That said, we are going to go and enjoy ourselves. Kyle has never been before and I want him to feel as happy as I do when I’m there. We love theme parks, we love America food and we’ll get so many nights of uninterrupted sleep. It’s going to be amazing.
I know one day we’ll take Isaac with us – when he can fully enjoy and appreciate where he is and what he’s doing. But for now, he’ll have a fantastic time with his grandparents, who he loves very much. He won’t even notice we’ve gone!
And that’s not to say we won’t take him on holiday with us soon – we have one planned already. Just not one that cost a fortune that he won’t necessarily care much about.
So there we have it. Worst parents? Possibly.
Have you ever been to Disney World?
Have you ever taken young children on holiday?
My personal favourite holiday is skiing and I do take my children….. In the hope that when they are older they will ski with me and love it as much as I do. It’s definitely a different holiday to a skiing holiday without children though.
Ahh I’d love to go skiing with Isaac! Maybe one day. And that just adds such skills to their life too.
I completely understand how you’re feeling. I’m leaving my 2 year old with my mom and going on a cruise in a couple weeks with my husband and brother in law. I feel massively guilty, and my husband is just like — it’s going to be great! Toddlers on vacation are just not relaxing, but I wish it were easier to turn off the Mom Brain.
I hope you have the BEST time and are able to fully enjoy everything!!
I absolutely hear ya. In reality a two year old isn’t going to remember the holiday. I hope your cruise goes well 🙂
First of all, if you have family willing and able to care of your child, TAKE ADVANTAGE! And know some of us are very jealous 😊
But also, going on a vacation without kids and having fun and getting sleep are all things that will benefit you and benefit your relationship as parents. And that is what is really best for children. Healthy parents in healthy relationships.
Ahh thank you for your comment. It’s so hard because you just feel so guilty, but at the same time you know it’s a good thing for everyone once in a while. And you’re absolutely right, we are so so lucky to have willing and able family nearby to help!
I’m looking forward to seeing your recap- your decision makes total sense. Yes you are a parent but you are also many other things and like you say he will have had a fab time with his grandparents.