So I’m almost 20 weeks pregnant and can happily say I mostly feel pretty good.
For me it’s been entirely true what people told me at the start when I was suffering so much during the first trimester, that the second trimester would be a dream. I very rarely get any sickness, most of my food aversions have disappeared (though chicken wings, my favourite crisps and apples apparently are still a no-go). My tiredness is not nearly as bad as it used to be. Occasionally if I’ve done a lot in a day I might have a little nap but generally I’m fine. I have loads of energy to do my workouts, my running and lots of walking (because what else is there to do in lockdown eh…).
I will say though that the thing that has crept up on me has been my body image. I mean this is no real shocker let’s be clear. A woman’s body changes very quickly week by week and it’s definitely an adjustment. No one likes to feel their jeans getting tighter round their waist or feel uncomfortable in general in clothes that not so long ago felt fine.
Obviously I’m pregnant and this is a thing. The baby is growing, my tummy is expanding – these are inescapable realities! But regardless of these facts, it’s still a hard one to adjust to. For the most part of this pregnancy I haven’t changed that much or look that pregnant. The biggest change was my boobs getting bigger. I’ve always had small boobs and so it’s been quite the shock to sudden have a lot more bounce going on!
Boobs aside though, recently I have definitely noticed my tummy “popping” more. And as excited as I am to look pregnant I’m in that awkward stage where it’s more of a bloated tummy than a baby bump look. And as it’s winter I’ve been under hoodies and jumpers and I guess somewhat subconsciously hiding that “bloat”. Ashamedly I’ve felt embarrassed of it.
I know this will sound very “woe is me” but I’ve had the (lucky) genetics of always having a flat tummy. Any weight I’d put on would go to my bum and thighs. But of course I’d get bloated from time to time because that’s life. If I ate a big meal or felt a bit gassy, my tummy would swell out a bit. I’d always be a bit embarrassed about this – as I expect most women would sadly. So now that that’s my constant shape right now I can’t help but feel a little bit self-conscious.
Like I said though, it’s an adjustment. I’m learning to embrace it. It definitely helps having Kyle there to make me feel better and attractive and to keep things in perspective. And I know very soon the bloat will look more like a bump and I will feel more confident in myself.
It is funny though to think that the bigger my bump is getting, the warmer it’s getting and the less clothes I’ll be wearing – so the bump can be “revealed” a bit more day-to-day. Big hoodies and jumpers just make me look like my normal self. I look forward to wearing tank tops and t-shirts so I can “feel” more pregnant all day, you know?
In other news, we’ve got our 20 week scan and midwife appointment on Wednesday which we’re really excited about. I can’t wait to see how much the baby has grown since our 16 week scan. I’m also quite anxious to speak to the midwife to talk about feeling the baby move, as I’ve yet to feel any “flutters”. I know for first time pregnancies it can happen a lot later but it’s a reassurance I need to hear from someone face-to-face, you know?
I also want to hear that the baby is growing well. I haven’t put a lot of weight on and I hope that I’m fuelling everything right. I run and workout a lot and I want to make sure this is all healthy. Don’t get me wrong, I eat a lot too but the weight gain thing is making me a little anxious. I feel fine, I’ve had no pains and I don’t feel under-fuelled but I’ve never been pregnant before so I’m second guessing everything! I know in reality it’s probably all fine, but hearing from someone with medical experience would just set my mind to rest.
If you’ve been pregnant, did you have an easy second trimester?
Do you have a good body image?