Reflections - AnnaTheApple

January 6, 2016

NY’s resolutions, parkrun overload and the National Trust

I’m not really one for New Year’s resolutions I have to be honest. I think the only thing I’d like to do better this year is not be late All. The. Time.

I’ve mentioned this before on my blog I’m sure but I just don’t leave myself enough contingency time. In the morning I won’t add in time for my ‘faffing’, i.e. tidying, swapping shoes at the last minute, forgetting stuff, spilling stuff… I’m a nightmare. I literally arrive everywhere at least 5 minutes late. So there we go, New Year’s resolution: be on time.

In terms of what I hope for the year, like I said in a previous post, I don’t really know. I just want to be happy. I’m not sure how that happiness will look though. I’m at a strange point in my life as everything I thought I was working towards changed very quickly. Basically my motto is “just keep swimming” (or I suppose in my case, just keep running). I have a lovely flat, Alfie, good friends and a very loving family so things are pretty good. I also have no real PB ambitions for the year, just healthy happy running. I’m still loving the gym so hopefully continue on with that and keep getting stronger.

On the subject of running… After the double parkrun on New Year’s Day I was starting to feel a tad parkrun’ed out. So many parkruns within a short amount of time! Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret them and I’ll always love parkrun but the weather on the Saturday just gone was awful and for once I just fancied staying in bed.

It was cold, windy and very very wet. I didn’t really want to be there but life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows (especially not in Britain) so I got myself out of bed and down there.

At the start, after jokingly debating with a friend about sitting back in the car with the heat on, I de-layered and got ready to run. At least it made me want to run quickly (well, as quick as I can lately and with that wind). The winter route goes down along the seafront bit which was just horrendous with the wind. It comes straight off the water and hits you sideways. I ran with (well, held on to!) a running club friend, Jim, and he helped pace me until I was able to push on on the last lap, after having gotten a second wind (no pun intended…).

A fellow blogger, April, was there as well which was nice – she almost out-sprinted me at the end but she was too polite, bless her. Take no prisoners I say! 😉

I got 23:59 which I was happy with. Straight away after finishing I grabbed my coat. Normally I’m really hot after running but I was quickly back to being cold. We were a miserable lot packing parkrun up, soaked, cold and wind-swept. Come on springtime!

The shower I had at home felt so good. It was ridiculously hot and strong so it was amazing. I didn’t want to come out! Thankfully the rain and wind died down and my parents and me met up to go to the National Trust’s Mottisfont Abbey and gardens.

I made sure to wear my wellies! The rain mostly held off and we had a lovely time just walking around the grounds and house. It was very quiet so it was nice and peaceful.

Bottom right: David Breuer-Weil’s Alien

There was a crazy statue (sculpture? Not sure how to describe it) of what looked like a man with his head in the ground. Apparently it’s of an alien that had landed from space… Random but cool.

We had a nice little hot drink in the coffee shop (I love this about the National Trust, there are always coffee shops!). I forwent the cake as I wasn’t fancying it (shock horror, I know) due to the Christmas excesses I’d been readily indulging in. After eating everything under the sun I’m ready to ease back into normal eating (I suppose cake eating is my normal eating though…).

I’m tempted to get a National Trust pass as it’s such a nice way to spend a day and we have several locations near us (for non-UK readers, National Trust is a conservation organisation that looks after historic buildings, gardens and areas and you can pay to look around them). It’s nice to have somewhere to walk and look around. Something to ponder over anyway for the future!

What weather do you really dislike? Mine is wind. I can deal with rain and cold, but wind is a killer.

What day trips do you enjoy?

What National Trust sites have you been to?

November 26, 2015January 3, 2020

Why I don’t regret getting injured

Firstly thank you for the lovely messages, comments and kind words after my last post. It really meant the world to me. I know I’m young and my life is ahead of me, I just needed that cathartic vent…

Anyway, onto the subject of this post. Since being injured and being unable to run I’ve been focusing a lot of my energies on going to the gym and really working hard at overall strength. Previously I had been following the New Rules of Lifting for Women which was really good but I was losing a bit of motivation for it. Doing the same two sets of workouts for weeks on end was getting boring. Don’t get me wrong, I still fully recommend that book and it’s highly likely I’ll get back into it (and it’s a great point of reference for different exercises). But after getting injured I needed a complete shake up of what I was doing and a new drive.

I actually found a great website called MuscleForLife that spoke a lot of sense to me by a guy called Mike Matthews. His website has loads of great resources and he talks a lot of sense in terms of workout splits, reps and different exercises (from what my albeit fairly limited knowledge and experience can tell anyway!).

I started breaking my workouts into body parts (sounds painful) and balancing ‘push/pull’ exercises. So for example, Monday is arms day and I’ll try and balance some bicep curls (a push exercise) with tricep pull downs (a pull exercise), amongst other things. And I’ve really been loving it.

What I’ve really come to learn is that you don’t need to go to the gym and come out sweating and gasping for air to know you’ve worked hard. Your heart rate doesn’t need to sky rocket to get a good workout in.In fact, I’ve never seen my body change as quickly as it has done with these kind of workouts than all the time I’ve ever been running. And I haven’t touched a cardio machine other than a three minute warm-up for each session. OK, OK I’ve only been doing this for a few weeks and I’m not saying I have muscles of steel or popping abs, but I can see the changes – they are tiny changes but they’re perceptible to me.

And more importantly, I can feel the changes. When I was down in the dumps about not running and I needed to find a new focus I decided to give myself the goal of strengthening my upper body (as well as continuing to strengthen the rest of me). One of my goals was to eventually achieve a full pull-up. I haven’t achieved that yet, but what I did achieve at the gym yesterday was almost there. Technically I achieved a neutral grip pull-up… or chin-up. To be honest I’m not entirely sure which it is, but there was definitely an ‘up’ in there 😉

It’s not a full pull-up because as my grip needs to be wider, which is ultimately so much harder because you’re using your back muscles to do most of the work, whereas what I achieved was kind of a combination of back muscles and biceps (a full chin-up uses solely biceps I believe).

I was so pleased you wouldn’t believe. I felt bad ass and like a warrior. If I fell off a cliff I can smile smugly knowing I can pull myself back up it 😉 and then run away from the zombies chasing me in this crazy scenario.

The point is, I don’t regret getting injured. It taught me a lot. Firstly it taught me not to be such an idiot about marathons and running. Three marathons in under six months is stupid for me. I’m an injury-prone runner and looking back I can see the times I was pushing myself when I should have been taking time off. Never ever underestimate the marathon distance. Even if you think “oh I’ll just pootle around really slowly and enjoy it” it’s still 26.2 bloody miles. There ain’t no pootle in that.

It also showed me that the gym isn’t just to keep me running and it isn’t necessarily a chore. It’s somewhere else I can push myself and feel like I’m achieving something amazing (for me anyway). I don’t always need PBs, a runner’s high or the fresh air to get that ‘punch in the air’ killer workout.

It’s another quiver in my bow of mistakes I’m learning from. Plus I got a huge medal soo… totally worth it 😉

Do you have any mistakes you don’t regret?

What is your favourite exercise?

What achievement are you most proud of?

November 25, 2015

Moving on

This is a bit of a random post. I just felt the urge to get some words down in a cathartic kind of brain fart, mainly triggered by the fact that I will finally be moving soon.

It’s been over eight months since Ben, my husband, told me he no longer wanted to be with me. Not a day goes past that I don’t think about it. Whether it’s wondering where the cracks began, why I didn’t see them or what my life is going to be like going forward. It’s not something I feel depressed about or cry about anymore. I don’t want sympathy or pity. That isn’t what this post is about. I actually don’t know what this post is about. It’s just a mental dump, forgive me.

I’ve been given a completion date for the flat I’ve bought (finally) so should be moving Friday 4th December. Ben lives in Switzerland and is enjoying his new life out there, with a new job and ambitions. I’m happy for him. We still keep in touch and this makes me both happy and sad. We’re still friends but it’ll never be the same.

I’m happy in myself and enjoying life. I will never regret the time Ben and me had together because we had so many good times and we grew together as people. But I do worry about the future. I have a ticking clock in the back of my mind which I’ve never had before.

I don’t want to get all Bridget Jones and Sex and the City on you, but I do worry that I’ll be that girl. I’m not outgoing and don’t thrive hugely well in social situations… I won’t ‘put myself out there’. Insecurities have cropped up that I never had before… What was wrong with me? Will anyone want someone as running obsessed as me? Am I boring? Nothing makes you face your flaws like the thought of dating. I was with Ben from when I was just 18 and was still ‘finding myself’ and growing as a person. Well, I’ve found myself and there’s not much I can do about changing now. This is me.

Thankfully I’m not really ready to look for anyone else. I feel exhausted and terrified by the whole idea. I’m happy on my own and enjoying the truly selfish aspects that that entails. No one to dress up for, no one to look good for, no one to try and make a good impression for. Just me, sat at home in my pyjamas, my hair a mess, eating too many apples.

I just worry that’ll I’ll get used that lifestyle. It’s so easy to just get stuck into my routines, my habits and introversion. I know what I’m like. I can become very routine-fixed and like things ‘just so’ and without anyone else there to mess up those routines they only become a bit more ingrained. But, like I said, I like my life at the moment and I like those routines. On to the next chapter!

But, still, that damn ticking clock…

If you’re with someone, how did you find your partner?

If you’re single, are you happy being single?

Do you worry about the future? I never used to. I thought I had my whole life planned out.

November 2, 2015

Coming out from the slump

Last week was rubbish, I’m not going to lie. After my fabulous weekend in Wales I came back to reality with a bit of a bump.

I decided to not go to the gym at all during the week to see if that helped my leg. By Thursday (a week since my last gym visit) I was going a bit stir crazy and my knee felt no better so I decided to go to the gym on Friday morning. But I arrived demotivated and feeling crap. I did some deadlifts and half-hearted core work before deciding I couldn’t be bothered. I left in a foul mood.

My dad picked me up to go to work that morning and he asked how I was… and I just burst into tears. Pathetic, I know. I just felt so down about not being able to run and the pointlessness of going to the gym to do injury prevention strength work when I’m injured. I felt so direction-less. OK I don’t need to worry about the Boston marathon (YET) but it’d be nice to just be enjoying my running without pressures or training plans and using the gym as a supplement to my training.

My dad, bless him, went through the problem with me step by step. Can I run? No. When can I run? I don’t know. Is it in the next few days? No. OK then forget about running. What’s the point in every day wondering and worrying about running if it’s clear my injury isn’t going to magically heal over night? My initial estimate of six weeks is proving to be correct, even perhaps optimistic now. For my mental sanity worrying about running isn’t going to help. I need to do exactly what I did last year and focus on something completely different.

On Saturday morning I still went to parkrun and I still felt a bit down.

It’s depressing everyone asking how the injury is…and the look of pity of fellow runners when you say “yep, four weeks and counting of no running”. But I enjoy seeing everyone and the social side of parkrun so I’ll continue to go and volunteer (trying my hardest to not be the bitter grumpy injured runner).

Alfie, as usual, loved racing around and got himself thoroughly wet and muddy. After closing down parkrun, a few of us went for a hot drink in the cafe. As I had Alfie I couldn’t go in to the cafe but Mike said he’d get me my drink, which is usually a peppermint tea. Bless him, he came out with a green tea… I’ve had green tea quite a few times and every time it’s made me feel really nauseous, despite really wishing I could drink it. But never look a gift horse in the mouth I thought I’d give it another go. It tasted nice… though I did feel queasy driving home, but not as bad as usual so this is progress!

I had a Halloween party that evening but I was in such a bad mood, being all grumpy and just wanting to slob out, I decided to not go. I did feel bad but the last thing I wanted to do was dress up and try and be sociable. You know when you just want to hibernate away and watch rubbish TV? Well that was me Saturday night.

It was the best thing I could have done because I watched, and was seriously inspired by, some YouTube videos of health and fitness vloggers (I’ve never really got into YouTube but now I’m hooked, it’s like reading blogs for the lazy!) and decided to pull myself together and get my pathetic grumpy bum to the gym the next morning and get a new focus.

I planned out a heavy leg routine and just went for it:

(No judgements on the weights please, this was hard for me)

I literally spent an hour and 45 minutes in the gym just going through these leg exercises, taking the adequate break between sets and monitoring my knee carefully. The ironic thing is, my knee doesn’t bother me in squatting or deadlifting at all so I could do all this without any pain.

I also got one of the fitness instructors to show me how to use a machine (the leg press). He was very helpful and I didn’t feel like just a “stupid girl” for asking – better to have proper form and complete exercises the way you should than be too embarrassed and injure yourself. Plus, this is what they’re paid for! You don’t need to pay a personal trainer to explain how to use a machine/perform an exercise.

I came out of the gym pumped and in such a better mood. I know I’m a broken record and I’m sorry about that but it is hard when you love something so much and suddenly you can’t do it. But I thoroughly enjoyed the gym and now I’m just going to continue strengthening my body, not just for running but in general and for my mental sanity. I enjoy lifting weights. It’s not running, but it’s the next best thing right now. I detest cardio machines and think the best way for me to spend my non-running time will be doing something I love, not desperately slogging away on a machine in the hope that my fitness won’t decline (that ship has sailed anyway). Plus one of my gym days is going to include some strength-based cardio, like my own version of Body Pump, where I’ll use high reps and low weights to get my heart rate going but keeping things interesting. The other days will be focused on my legs & glutes, shoulders & arms and back & chest. Though I’m just seeing how it goes and what I fancy doing right now.

Basically I’m feeling more happy about things. I hope I haven’t droned on too much about not running… Onwards and upwards to a more positive place!

How was your weekend? Any Halloween events?

When you go to the gym, what do you focus on? Cardio or weights?

Do you watch Vlogs? Any recommendations?

October 7, 2015

A few reflections – and I’m strangely OK!

So my marathon didn’t go how I wanted it to, obviously. And still a few days later I’m paying the price.

It’s very similar to what I had last year with my IT band – except the other leg. It’s funny because I re-read an old post of the fateful last run before I took time off around Christmas and it was almost identical to what happened in the marathon (so handy having these blog posts to refer to!). That took me around 4-6 weeks to come back to running. My expectations are firmly set. I’d rather think worst case then I can be pleasantly surprised if it’s not that bad.

Am I about to fall into a well of despair and go all dark and shady on you? No. I’m surprisingly OK about the whole thing. Oh yeah it fully sucks, don’t get me wrong. I’d love to be moaning about a few post-marathon aches and debating when my first run will be, instead of limping along pathetically feeling pain walking up and down stairs. But getting upset about it won’t solve anything and I’ve achieved so much this year that it would be almost greedy to want more and more. I’m an injury-prone runner, this is something that is bound to keep happening to me not matter how many squats and deadlifts I do.

I knew I was needing a break from running anyway as I was drawing close to the marathon. Running was feeling harder and I was feeling tired. I think I’ve done a lot recently and this injury has come at the best time (if ever there is a good time to have an injury!). I’d have liked to have voluntarily taken a break, obviously, but hey ho!

That said, I have wondered what exactly what went wrong at the marathon. I have literally had no knee pain at all this year. My IT band hasn’t felt uncomfortable or twingey. My runs before the marathon felt fine. I was more concerned about my shin than anything (which by the way, is absolutely fine!). I’d stopped foam rolling and stretching as religiously as I used to and I know my quads (and probably my IT bands I suppose) were tightish so that might not have helped.

I think the main reason could be the trainers I wore. With the house moving chaos my trainers have gotten all mixed up. The day before the marathon I was debating which to wear. My new ASICS have been great during training but I wondered how they’d fair in a full marathon. I knew (from Strava – very handy) that I wore my Mizunos for the Cheddar Gorge marathon and they felt fine so I thought I’d go for them. Unfortunately I have two pairs of identical Mizunos (whhhhhy don’t I just get rid of old trainers?!) and mistakenly picked up the old ones that I’d retired. It’s funny because I remember looking at them in Bournemouth and realising they were a lot cleaner than the ones that had run Cheddar Gorge…bugger. This is the only thing I can think of. I’m a runner who needs support in their trainers and my old Mizunos are definitely past their best.

I’m seeing my physio Friday (ahh, haven’t seen him in a while!) and I’m expecting him to say no running for at least two weeks, and then reassess. Icing has been my friend (I wish I was talking about the cake variety…).

Monday morning I used my commute well – and my Hello Fresh ice packs! (An idea I got from Mary).

Speaking of icing, I forgot to mention in my recap about how after the marathon a few of us trundled into the see in just our socks. It was freeeeeezing, but it was good fun and fantastic after such a long run (plus walk!). Though a wave did splash against me, causing me to get a wet bum. Nice. I wish I’d gotten a photo but, like I said, my phone was dead.

Anyway, for the moment I’m feeling like a rest is a good idea. This week I’m doing nothing, even the gym (not that I could do anything other than upper body and core right now). Getting good nutrition and a good night sleep each night are my priority.

The latest Marathon Talk podcast with the interview with Dr. Kirk Parsley about the importance of sleep has only further highlighted that the best thing I can do right now is make sure I get a good night sleep to help with the recovery process. Getting up at 5am to hobble round the gym is not going to help!

My only one annoyance is parkrun. I was doing so well to go so consistently and I’m second on the female points table. *Sighs* but I’m not going to risk anything. I’ll volunteer this week and be a bit grumpy 😉

What are your priorities when you’re injured? Nutrition? Sleep? Cross-training?

How much sleep do you get each night?

How much sleep do think is best for you?