Last weekend after getting back from our cycle, I took Alfie for a long walk. I didn’t bother showering before I left because it didn’t make sense and Alfie needed a walk. I got back from the walk and experienced something quite horrific.
I got ready to get in the shower. My hair was in plaits so I took them out and ran my fingers through it to untangle it. I felt something stuck in my hair and a sharp sting to my neck. I had already take my contact lenses out so couldn’t really see but when I looked in the mirror there was definitely something in there.
I panicked and shouted to Ben. I flipped my head upside down and yelled that there was something in my hair that had stung me. I was flailing about a bit and he couldn’t quite see through the voluminous mass that is my hair. His demeanour instantly changed as soon as he found what the ‘thing’ was. He started speaking in that calm, slow voice that you use with panicked animals. This freaked me out even more – the thing in my hair must be deadly, must be massive and dangerous.
He grabbed my hairbrush and started whacking at my hair in true Man Style. This scared me even more that he didn’t even want to touch the thing. I started crying and wailing like a lunatic, terrified this giant flesh eating spider was about to crawl up my hair onto my scalp.
Eventually he got it off me. The verdict: it was a wasp. I flopped onto the bed in a heap of emotional drainage.
I know I reacted in a very whimpish way but frankly it terrified me. Though it was quite funny afterwards. All occurred butt naked. Good times 😉
But then, not two days later another attack of nature.
I was drying my hands on our tea towel which was hanging from a hook and suddenly out dropped what I thought was a dead spider. It was all scrunched up and not moving. Then it jumped up after lulling us into a sense of false security. I balked and ran up the stairs, Alfie got the hell out of the kitchen and Ben was left to deal with the fiend. but I’m a bit of a weird one in that I hate killing thing so I made him take it down the road and throw it in a bush – far away from our house. I don’t want that thing making it’s way back to us!
Whew. Jeeeze. Nature is a bitch.
In other news. Alfie has been keeping a keen eye on my foam rolling lately. I’ve been using a tennis ball on my calves to help loosen them up. Sadly for him I’m using his ball. He used to get exciting but now he realises that ‘catch’ is no longer what’s about to happen.
And again, where are his paws???
And on a random note, I found one of these at a petrol station.
It tasted amazing and was very refreshing. I’m quite impressed how mainstream coconut products are becoming!
What are you scared of?
How do you get rid of spiders?
What’s your favourite coconut product?
I properly needed this hilarity today. Thank you. I know I shouldn’t laugh but I just couldn’t help it. The thought of Ben and the hairbrush etc…. You have amazing hair and apparently nature also thinks so! xx
lauren recently posted…The Summer So Far ….
Glad to be of service 😀
AnnaTheApple recently posted…OM Yoga Magazine September – Yoga while pregnant and a giveaway
Oh dear God. I hate wasps so much. Last summer they were everywhere and I was stung twice while out running on the neck and chest, and then once a wasp somehow got into my bed and stung me multiple times on the leg. I try to be compassionate towards all creatures, but wasps really, really try my patience. I just can’t kill things though…so I shriek at spiders and hope they’ll go away and leave me alone 😉
I’ll have to keep an eye out for that coconut water – it sounds gorgeous…but it can’t be anywhere near as gorgeous as Alfie. His expression is so morose, bless him. I’m sure he’ll live without his tennis ball for a little while longer. And his lack of paws is just so adorable…I wish I could take care of him for you while you’re away in Berlin! I don’t think I’d want to give him back though 😉
xxx
Jess recently posted…Race Recap ~ Pieces of 8 Trail Half Marathon ~ 2:07:15
Yes wasps are evil. How terrible though to be stung multiple times?? Is it bees that die after they sting you once? I still couldn’t have killed it though – maybe if I had swatted it and accidentally killed it (wasp manslaughter) but I couldn’t have stamped on it or anything like that afterwards.
Haha my mum is looking after Alfie while we’re away and she always says that “well he’s happy here now sorry!” but he always wants to come home or at least this is what I tell myself… 😉 Anyway she has THREE dogs she hardly needs one more.
AnnaTheApple recently posted…OM Yoga Magazine September – Yoga while pregnant and a giveaway
Wow…Levi Roots is everywhere, even on coconut water. He’s done so well for himself! 🙂 I’m not a big fan of pigeons at all. The way they make that cooing sound and fly right at you is horrible. Alfie is very cute by the way, obviously there is a hint of bias there. 🙂
Jemma @ Celery and Cupcakes recently posted…My pregnancy survival kit – #38 weeks
I know – he clearly has an eye for what’s hot right now!
Urgh pigeons yes – flying rats!
Hehe yes Alfie is a good solid name 😉
AnnaTheApple recently posted…OM Yoga Magazine September – Yoga while pregnant and a giveaway
oh my god! That spider is massive. I think I would have moved house if I had of found that and I am not even overly scared of spiders.
I am scared of snakes though. Like, I can’t even watch them on TV without wanting to cry. My husband tried to get me to hold one once. Ermmm, no thanks.
Dannii @ Hungry Healthy Happy recently posted…Comment on Spicy Summer Burrito by Dannii
I KNOW – it was HUGE and I just legged it.
Wow that’s a big fear. I think I’m OK with snakes but then I’ve never really seen one other than on TV so who knows. Not sure I’d want to hold one either.
AnnaTheApple recently posted…OM Yoga Magazine September – Yoga while pregnant and a giveaway
Eeeesh that spider looks terrifying! And the wasp too, how scary!
That coconut water looks delicious – I’ve noticed coconut creeping into all the shops as of late!
Claire @ Flake and Cake recently posted…Goodbye Harry-Dog
Everyone is noticing the coconut trend now. Just wait, they’ll be some coconut cereal or children-focused sugar-filled coconut-based product so far away from its natural source 🙁
AnnaTheApple recently posted…OM Yoga Magazine September – Yoga while pregnant and a giveaway
Hello Anna!
Your poor thing! I once had a bee sting and was very sick from it. Beeing Danish I was in chock with the size of the spiders they have here in Australia when I moved here, but now 17 years later, I am learning to live with them.
To get back to the bees, they do make some yummy honey. I couldn’t live without honey!
Oh God Australia have ginormous spiders don’t they!? I couldn’t move there purely for that.
Ahh yes, bees seem more friendly than wasps. Wasps provide no service in my eyes!
AnnaTheApple recently posted…OM Yoga Magazine September – Yoga while pregnant and a giveaway
This made me laugh so hard! I recently pulled out a (freshly washed!) pair of jeans to wear and out rolled a massive daddy long legs – I think I jumped from the top of the stairs to the bottom without touching any of the stairs in between, I was so terrified! hahahaha!
lucie recently posted…Warm Butternut Squash Salad with Poppy Seeds, Kale and Pomegranate
URGHHH daddy long legs are so creepy. They fly around with those horrible legs…bleurgh!
AnnaTheApple recently posted…OM Yoga Magazine September – Yoga while pregnant and a giveaway
Argh how scary! I hate wasps, but I am terrified of spiders. I am afraid that I am not sentimental and would rather Andy sucked up the spiders with a hoover as otherwise they come back. I can manage the pin head spiders as they don’t move about much, but the big black ones scare me and normally leave me in tears.
That coconut water sounds good- I really like either plain stuff or the vita coco that is with mango and peach, and I do use coconut oil in cooking. I do quite like coconut sugar but I don’t use that as much in things.
Maria @ runningcupcake recently posted…The streak comes to an end
But then it’s in the Hoover!! Isn’t that worse? It making its nest in there waiting for it’s chance for revenge!
I haven’t tried coconut sugar yet, but I love the water, the oil and those ice lollies which I finally found in Tesco. They were delicious!
AnnaTheApple recently posted…OM Yoga Magazine September – Yoga while pregnant and a giveaway
I’m sorry, but this made me laugh…especially when Ben was talking to you in ‘that calm, slow voice you use with panicked animals! I would have freaked had it been me though, especially the spider. I can’t believe he whacked you with a brush! Poor you! I don’t mind wasps normally, but if it was in my hair I wouldn’t have been happy. When we were on honeymoon I trapped three wasps under glasses during one meal!
Mary recently posted…Back to school
To be honest, him whacking me with the brush was the least of my issues. I was two seconds away from telling him to cut my hair I was that scared. Quite glad he didn’t in retrospect…
AnnaTheApple recently posted…A post from a husband needing advice…
The other half is absolutely petrified of spiders, and we’ve had loads since we moved into our new house, big beastly ones like that one you found! I love everything coconut: water, oil, butter, yoghurt 😛
Lauren (@poweredbypb) recently posted…Vegan Fig and Plum Crumble
Oh no that is a disaster with your other half being scared. This would not bode well with Ben and me. We’d be run out of our house by spiders!
AnnaTheApple recently posted…A post from a husband needing advice…